To Tori,

I am not sure if you even read these blogs. The relationship with you and your Mom just drive me crazy. I have 3 grown girls that worship the ground there father walks on and never have been jealous of there relationship. I know my girls love me, but when it comes to there Dad they are in ahhh. I love it. For some reason I think your Mom was jealous of this relationship and not endured it like I have. Little girls look up to there father and hope to marry someone close, loving, nice and has to have feelings. You have found that with Dean. I don't care about what my kids have done in the past, even though sometimes girls can be hurtful. It is called moving on and not to dwell on the past we all make mistakes. My husband and I now have two grandchildren and our in our lives. I know it is hurtful the relationship with your Mom, but if I was her I would be jumping over fences and hoops to get things right. Not to hurt you but your Mom is to much into herself. Some of the pictures I see with you and your Mom she is a little stiff and stuffy. I have not seen the last show yet, if she does not show up, you must break ties and move on. Sometimes we have to sacrifice pick up and move on. The ball is in your Mom court. If things do work out I would have my guard up for the rest of my life.. Good luck

Tori,
I agree.......We cant fix our parents so we just accept it for what it is.
Your family now is with Dean and the kids and what a beautiful family you have!!
Your Mother is terrible, I cant imagine ever being like this with any of my 3 boys.
UNCONDITIONAL LOVE......... I learned this from my father, you see my Mother was a bit like yours and therefor my Daddy raised me and my 3 sisters and brother. My Dad hit the road with all of us and thats that....
My three boys gave me 5 beautiful granddaughter and I totally dig the granny thing, wouldnt have it any other way.
Tori you are a very lucky girl, my advise to you is "fix what you can, pray about what you cant" and it will all be OK.......I promise

Tori it really is time to cut off the relationship with your mother. Just because she gave birth to you doesn't mean she is a mother. A REAL mother would never constantly put down her daughter. She would never verbally hurt her daughter over and over. A real mother would Never blame her daughter as the reason her father died. Your mother is never going to accept you for who you are. You will never be good enough for her. Your mother is a toxic, bitter, ice cold self centered person who only cares about herself. I wouldn't want that kind of person in my kids life. A mother should be someone who foremost treats their daughter with respect and love. She would NEVER intentionally hurt her child. If I had a mother like yours I wouldn't even dream of having such a toxic person in my kids lives. I do hope you take Dean's advice as he truly has your best interest at heart and cut this woman out of your lives. It isn't good for your kids to see you crying and being upset because your mother has yet again hurt you. You are blessed to have so many friends that are more like "family" than your mother. They are good for you and your children. It is time to move on with your life where you will have joy and happiness not unhappiness and heartache.

[font="Tahoma"][/font] Tori, I too have a mother that is self-centered and not mature enough in her 70's to understand that the love of a child is a wonderful thing, not competition. Your mother is the same type of grandmother that mine is to my children. I think of the wonderful relationship I had with my grandparents, and feel so badly for my children who do not have that same link. But you are an awesome and creative mom who gives her children what they truly need - love - and that will be their saving grace. Not having a once a year - maybe - relationship with a grandmother who doesn't really want to be one. I just read your mom's comments about Stella's birthday party and it infuriates me that she doesn't see how much family means to you. You are a sweet and caring person who is so giving with your love and thoughtfulness - you have life long friends who appreciate you as well as Dean who worships you and understands you. Candy Spelling is a hauty tauty who can't get past herself to be a decent mother and grandmother. As hard as it is to accept, I think you already know, you've developed your own family and they are keepers. BTW - I lOVE the Guncles and the whole friend network. I read both of your books and thought they were outstanding. I'm still trying to get thru Candyland - it's so boring and self-touting that I can't finish it. What does that tell you. Keep up with this show, my family just loves it! Thank you for sharing!

I think that Candy Spelling is just plain wrong. I can't believe some of the hurtful things she has done and said to her daughter. I hate that she uses the media to communicate with Tori. I feel like Tori is getting hurt over and over and one day Liam and Stella will be able to read the hurtful things their grandmother has said about their mother. If Candy really wanted a relationship with her grandchildren then she would go about it the way most people do and communicate with her daughter. I think Tori is a wonderful mother and wife. I think her focus on her children and her husband is genuine. I believe that Tori has a wonderful heart. I am just sorry that her mother can't appreciate and love her the way she should. I just read the letter that Candy posted on TMZ and just wanted to voice my opinion.

I do love the show and I think that the invitation that Tori sent to her mother came from a genuine place of wanting her mother to be involved her in children's lives. I think Tori tries to do most things from her heart. I just hate that her mother is so full of anger and hate that she can't see what a wonderful daughter she has.

Tori I think you are precious and please don't let this one woman's opinion cause you to doubt yourself and who you are. I think the love and Support that Dean has for you is evidence enough of just how wonderful you are.

Many Blessings to you all!

Armywifejmt

Both Tori and Candy are obviously hurt for their own reasons. We probably don't know everything. Both of them need to put their pride aside and work on their issues. Plenty of Mothers & Daughters do this everyday, work on their issues with each other. If they don't at least try one more time they'll never know, before too much time passes and it's too late. Both of them need to stop being so freakin stubborn!

TO ME IT LOOKS LIKE TORI IS TRING . BUT THAT MOTHER OF HERS WANTS IT HER WAY OR NO WAY. HOW COULD YOU NOT WANT TO BE PART OF YOUR CHILDS LIFE OR YOUR GRANDCHILDEN . HER MOM IS BEING A SPOLIED BRAT AND SELFISH.

Her mom wants to be in her grandchildren's life ,and has made that very clear . That is not the issue here..............Candy just wants it to be private .. like a normal situation and family. That is a reasonable request .She wants nothing to do with the tv show and camera's in her face and respectfully has made her wishes pretty clear. However,
the only way is Tori's way ...and that is on national Television !
Tori is making a drama out of this for the ratings that it may bring her show .( that means more money )
....and she is hoping this will ensure more people will tune in ...hence the show won't be canceled out of lack of storylines ( Means even MORE money)

In my opinion, Tori should refrain from airing the lack of relationship between her and her mother as much as possible. It should be a private thing, even though I know with them being celebrities it's impossible for it to be totally private. It's possible to not discuss it on your reality show, on almost every episode. I have changed the channel so many times simply because I don't find the saga of Tori and Candy entertaining. I agree with Dean that Tori should just drop it, move on and be a mother and wife. By the way I think Tori's doing a wonderful job at both. And I can also understand Tori's need to hold out hope of her and her mom being cordial with one another and Candy being an active grandmother. Do I think it will happen? Probably not, simply because it's been too public. I wish Tori and Dean the best!

Not sure if Tori actually reads this but I thought I would share a bit.
My youngest Granddaughter just turned 1 also. My mother has never seen her either. This is very upsetting to me also. I have 4 Granddaughters, none of which live close to me, so every chance I get I want to see them.
Two of my Granddaughters came and stayed with us for 3 weeks, my mother visited once for about 2 hours and only if I would feed her and my nephews.
My Mother also tells everyone how fair she is with all of her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. She just bought my nephews a laptop because it was on sale and said she was going to send my granddaughter a $10 gift card. Sounds fair to me.
It just hurts. I don't know if its worse for you or for me. My mom still calls me, every time she needs something, or my brother or sister or their families need something. Oh yeah she supports my brother(older) and sister(younger), we are all adults.
I turned 51 years old and it still hurts. Tori needs to tell Dean he can't fix everything and he needs to be supportive.
And remember, at least you are in a position to supply everything that your family needs.

Tori said it best last night. She is going to have to set boundries and lower her expectations when it comes to her Mom. I thought it mature of her to glean the need for a new attitude from the conflict she had with Dean. She could have sulked and gotten mad at him for being upfront with her. Instead she saw his concern and frustration for what it was even if she didn't care for its delivery. She doesn't want her Mom out of her life, its just not going to happen. I truly believe if Tori reaches out to her Mom and doesn't set any expectations, her Mom will come around in her own time. I say slow and steady wins the race.

tori's mom needs to bitch slaped she has no reason to be a bitch to tori i mean wtf

has she ever done to her mother she keeps saying she wants her mother to b in her

life. but her mother keeps chitting on her. :angry i know where tori's coming from.

i don't get a long with my own mother either.

she treats me like a child. dean is right she needs to close the book with her mom and

move on. it's not healthy for her, dean, the marriage. kids for her keep going on & on.

i know it's hard but true. she keeps getting hurt over & over. tori u really need to get

on with ur life and move on